Often I plan holidays and it doesn't work out.

People seem to be busy and do not have time to go along with it. At other times, people are half way across the world, too far to join me.

So many times I have sat and planned and thought about all the things that could be done. I feel disappointed over and over again. Yet, I still keep planning and looking forward to them, I guess I'm just silly that way.

Somehow it just feels special to be able to think of a place you really want to visit and when you actually do, it just feels extra special. I always feel wary of sharing my plans since I'm afraid it won't work out or just gets ruined. It feels as though once I talk about them, they are doomed to fail or opened to rejection or criticism.

Places I want to visit don't work out. I wait for a few months, a year, two years and still it doesn't happen. I've been meaning to visit a place for such a long time that after more than two years, I just gave up on ever going. When I finally went, it wasn't so special anymore. I guess it just got ruined by all the disappointments along the way. Hmm... I guess I just have to keep trying and someday, hopefully my plans will all work out and I finally manage to set foot on where I would like to go.

I wish my family were here and we could all go together.